Enjoy these biting, sharp, tart sarcasm quotes by noted men and women. To know more on famous long quotations and sayings, read on.

Sarcasm Quotes

If you want to express your thoughts, anger, humor etc. without being blatant, then sarcasm is your weapon. Being sarcastic does not just imply bitter derision or caustic remarks. Sarcasm is in fact a witty expression that comes loaded with layers of meaning and is better used to pack a contemptuous punch on people or things. All said and done, being sarcastic is a talent and not everyone is blessed with it. Here are some famous long quotations and sayings to help you explore the real wit of sarcasm.

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

- Oscar Wilde

A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.

- Rabindranath Tagore

Books are not made for furniture, but there is nothing else that so beautifully furnishes a house.

- Henry Ward Beecher

It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.

- Voltaire

She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it).

- Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass , Lewis Carroll

Nothing stinks like a pile of unpublished writing.

- Sylvia Plath

A woman is only a woman.

- Rudyard Kipling

Borrow trouble for yourself, if that's your nature, but don't lend it to your neighbours.

- Rudyard Kipling

San Francisco is a mad city - inhabited for the most part by perfectly insane people whose women are of a remarkable beauty.

- Rudyard Kipling

I should prefer to have a politician who regularly went to a massage parlour than one who promised a laptop computer for every teacher.

- A. N. Wilson

A building has integrity just like a man. And just as seldom.

- The Fountainhead , Ayn Rand

Sex is God's joke on human beings.

- Bette Davis

I like the silent church before the service begins, better than any preaching.

- Self-Reliance and Other Essays , Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every woman is just a different kind of problem.

- Chuck Palahniuk

I was really too honest a man to be a politician and live.

- Socrates

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

- Socrates

Once made equal to man, woman becomes his superior.

- Socrates

Humor is reason gone mad.

- Groucho Marx

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of width.

- Steven Wright

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.

- Groucho Marx

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

- Steven Wright

I met this wonderful girl at Macy's. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator.

- Steven Wright

A camel makes an elephant feel like a jet plane.

- Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

Showing off is the fool's idea of glory.

- Bruce Lee

It is horrifying that we have to fight our own government to save the environment.

- Ansel Adams

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

- Eleanor Roosevelt

Absence - that common cure of love.

- Lord Byron

Love is often nothing but a favorable exchange between two people who get the most of what they can expect, considering their value on the personality market.

- Erich Fromm

Death, so called, is a thing which makes men weep, And yet a third of life is passed in sleep.

- Lord Byron

I have a great mind to believe in Christianity for the mere pleasure of fancying I may be damned.

- Lord Byron

The grace of God means something like: Here is your life. You might never have been, but you are because the party wouldn't have been complete without you.

- Frederick Buechner

Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly?

- Frida Kahlo

For the bureaucrat, the world is a mere object to be manipulated by him.

- Karl Marx

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.

- Jerome K. Jerome

All societies on the verge of death are masculine. A society can survive with only one man; no society will survive a shortage of women.

- Germaine Greer

Marilyn Monroe wasn't even her real name, Charles Manson isn't his real name, and now, I'm taking that to be my real name. But what's real? You can't find the truth, you just pick the lie you like the best.

- Marilyn Manson

Probably the only place where a man can feel really secure is in a maximum security prison, except for the imminent threat of release.

- Germaine Greer

It is the youth who must inherit the tribulation, the sorrow... that are the aftermath of war.

- Herbert Hoover

Older men declare war. But it is the youth that must fight and die.

- Herbert Hoover

People tend to forget their duties but remember their rights.

- Indira Gandhi

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