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Quotes By Garrison Keillor

Nationality
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DOB
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7-08-1942

This American author, best known for breathing life into a fictional town named Lake Wobegon, once admitted that most of his stories were inspired by the tales narrated by his uncle. Keillor’s uncle used to tell him stories about how certain mischief makers would push an outhouse right when an unsuspecting man was inside. However, when asked to delve into details, the writer’s uncle always refused to oblige. This is where Garrison’s imagination began coming into play. He reconstructed the entire episode of tipping over an outhouse, how the victim would devise a plan to come out of such a situation, and the stark contrast between the emotions the tipper and the man trapped inside felt. He contemplated on even the minutest component, including whether the outhouse was tipped on its back or the front.

In another piece, titled ‘My North Dakota Railroad Days’, written for the ‘New Yorker’ magazine, he says he drew his inspiration from his father’s experiences as a mail sorter for the railways. Young Keillor was always fascinated by the trains in Minnesota and when he grew up he conjured one up that was bigger than those he had ever seen. He named his imaginary train, ‘The Prairie Queen’ and made it seem unbelievably real. In fact, when it was republished in a North Dakota magazine, people wrote him letters saying they couldn’t recollect having ever seen such a train in the state. These mails bear testimony to this brilliant writer’s talent as a storyteller, as he himself agrees, “When people take pure fiction as journalism, there is no greater compliment.”

Evelyn was an insomniac so when they say she died in her sleep, you have to question that.

- Pontoon: A Novel of Lake Wobegon , Garrison Keillor

The French have a new president, the British will soon have a new P.M., and we envy them as we endure the endless wait for this small dim man to go back to Texas and resume his life.

- Garrison Keillor

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.

- Lake Wobegon U.S.A. , Garrison Keillor

Life is unjust and this is what makes it so beautiful. Every day is a gift. Be brave and take hold of it.

- Garrison Keillor

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

- Leaving Home , Garrison Keillor

You get old and you realize there are no answers, just stories.

- Pontoon: A Novel of Lake Wobegon , Garrison Keillor

Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.

- Leaving Home , Garrison Keillor

A book is a gift you can open again and again.

- Garrison Keillor

Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.

- Leaving Home , Garrison Keillor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

- Garrison Keillor

When in doubt, look intelligent.

- Garrison Keillor

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

- Garrison Keillor

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.

- Garrison Keillor

A young writer is easily tempted by the allusive and ethereal and ironic and reflective, but the declarative is at the bottom of most good writing.

- Garrison Keillor

Intelligence is like a four-wheel drive. It allows you to get stuck in more remote places.

- Garrison Keillor

A minister has to be able to read a clock. At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast and get the peas out of the freezer.

- Garrison Keillor

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.

- Happy to Be Here , Garrison Keillor

I want to resume the life of a shy person.

- Garrison Keillor

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

- Garrison Keillor

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever.

- Garrison Keillor

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

- We Are Still Married: Stories & Letters , Garrison Keillor

I think the most un-American thing you can say is, 'You can't say that.'

- Garrison Keillor

I'm not busy... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think my schedule looked so busy.

- Garrison Keillor

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.

- Garrison Keillor

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head.

- Garrison Keillor

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